Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Craving Achievable Stability

"She was not quite 2 when they took her in from the foster agency. Her mom had a lot of struggles and could barely take care of herself, much less a toddler. Her new foster family fell in love with her immediately, enjoying her laughter and the silly tricks that she would do, but especially the brief moments at bedtime when she would sit in one of their laps and snuggle. Over time, both she and her biologic mom achieved milestones - hers including learning how to write her name and memorizing her address and phone number; her mom's had more to do with parenting classes and a steady job. And after some time, it became apparent that they would reunite. They moved a lot - never could quite achieve the stability that most people crave. She lived with her mom some, as well as a variety of extended relatives. She called her old foster family every once in a while - she had never forgotten the phone number - and every single time they inquired about her new address and made a trip to the post office, sending off a box of goodies. Art supplies. Candy. Books. But most of all, love. They were intentional in their influence. They didn't just answer the phone and have a conversation, they acted. Even thought it was painful. Even though they worried about the fact that every phone call was from a different phone number in a new state. Even though it cost them. So how did it turn out? On her 18th birthday, the phone rang again. 'Mom, can I come home?' You can guess what the answer was." (Fostering Hope day 12 Deb Shropshire)
In foster care the ultimate goal for a child is reunification with the birth parents. Though that is the goal, it's not always easy. Sometimes the foster parents can have the child for a few years before they go back to their birth parents. Sometimes the foster parents have to fight with the desire to know what's best, even though they have no power over the ultimate decision. The child can also be confused in wanting to be with their birth family but also missing their foster family. It can even make the child feel like they aren't being loyal. So...
  • Pray for the birth parents that go through the process of reunification. They go through rehabs, work projects and parenting classes. Pray that they would learn how to take care of their children properly for reunification. Also, pray for the foster parents that are hurting because they are missing the children that were placed and removed from their home. Lastly, pray for the child as they deal with the stress of being placed, removed and placed again. Ask that they would feel comfort and peace, and they would have good life-long relationship with foster parents. 

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