Monday, September 21, 2015

Why I couldn't date a vegetarian

I was eating lunch the other day, and I realized all my entire meal was meat. Not just the main entre, but the entire meal. Everything had meat. Meat on meat, if you will. And, at that moment, I realized that I could never date a vegetarian, it wouldn’t work, ever. They would be offended always. I would eat way too much meat in front of them. We would have discussions like, "babe, maybe you should just try to go one meal without eating meat, just one a day." And, I would say something like, "uh, yeah no. That will probably ruin my entire day. I can’t because I value my mental health." Or we would have conversations about the rights of animals, and I would undoubtedly make some snarky remark about finding joy in taking those rights away. I know, you probably think I’m a horrible person at the moment, and hey maybe you’re right, but it’s my defense mechanism. I make jokes when I'm uncomfortable or disagree. I'me working on it, ok? So, I made the decision to save others the trouble and not date vegetarians ever. Lets be honest I say enough offensive things without that pressure in my life. 

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